Roy’s Sunday Letter for October 25, 2026
A favorite song of Merle Haggard was “My Favorite Memory.” A song of the memory of good times and long-time love.
What would be one of your favorite memories of places, family, friends, and events? We also learn from memories that may be painful. This Sunday Letter is about our short-term and long-term memories, which seem important to retain and enjoy, and which memories to let go and fade away.
“Nothing is really lost as long as we can remember,” The Story Girl
Our memories can be warm, joyful and motivate us to share with others. Recent memories, or those of long ago can give us renewing energy, meaning, and the ways we have related to others. Even the best of memories can be messy, confusing and true to the age, place, and life stage of you at that time.
Memory has an important role in our physical, emotional, and spiritual lives. Memories allow us to encode, store, and retrieve knowledge and experiences. In recalling a memory, we may engage seeing, hearing, feeling, smelling or even tasting. We use all these senses when we recall a movie, book, or preparing to ride a bike after years of not riding.
For those of us with memory retention we are aware and concerned with friends and so many others living with Alzheimer’s, dementia, brain injury, mental disability, or depression. When I with those with memory loss, I do my best to be present with their interests, connections, and ability. The honoring of those moments is an honoring of us all.
These long-ago events were important to me then, even more important today.
- Jim Greene brought N. Carolina Campus Ministers together in retreat for four nights. three days. “In The Oaks” was my first professional retreat. I built on those memories with my agency work, board members and staff for the next forty years.
- I remember meeting my first AIDS patient. In the l980’s a grandmother had surgery and received a blood transfusion, at John Peter Smith. At that time, it was a time when no one knew about “bad blood.” She asked me to set with her when she told her grandchildren of her then to be a shortened life.
- The memory and print photo of the 2003 ribbon cutting to open The Hope & Healing Place, A Grief & Loss Center, Amarillo, remains alive with the sight of volunteers, families and supporters on that most special day. Twenty-three years later HHP continues to serve children and families in the Texas Panhandle.
- My first day at William James Middle School is a memory of panic, smothering and being swallowed by crowded hallways of kids. The increase of noise, being swallowed in the crowded hallways between classes and feeling the loss of knowing where to go and do of D. McRae Elementary. By day three these were my people, my generation.
Roy, so many memories of the faces, places, and event of how I got to be me.
I find it interesting that I have vivid memories of incidents that happened years ago and often I can’t remember why I entered a room. I think we bank good memories, gloss over some of the bad memories and continue on living in the present. Because of a recent move I boxed up so many memories and in this new place they may remain in boxes for my children to go go through I am making new memories and leaving some behind. All of us are a collection of memories, I will store them in the back of my mind and move forward.
You are indeed making new and renewing memories,,,,being brave….teaching us all!!
The first memory to come to mind is of course a childhood memory. I was maybe 6 years old and my mother’s brother was working in a local movie theater as an usher. The Disney movie Jungle Book had just been released and I spent most of a Saturday afternoon, in the theater “by myself” (watched over by my uncle) watching the movie three times in a row. I received a silicone Baloo the Bear toy with my ticket. Over four-and-a-half hours or so, I left America for the jungles of India. I sang along with bears and orangutans. I grieved the trade of a magical life for civilization at the end. Remembering that makes me realize how much that movie impacted how I have seen the world since then. Thank you Roy, for reminding us to take stock of our memories.
and the Jungle you is still with you, even today.
what a delightful and meaningful sharing,,,,,,more please, whatever age, whatever movie.
My most vivid childhood memory is of my grandmother. I lived with her during a crucial childhood period. She was a dryland farmer’s wife and beloved by her community for her unconditional generosity… she gave me that precious gift…what we do for the least of these is so important.
At least once a week my grandmother would say to me “when we are in the garden today, we will gather extra beans, corn and potatoes ( it was different depending on which vegetable was producing) and take them to the Smith family ( a different one each week).”
After gathering the vegetables, we would ride in her old black Ford, with a push button stater, which she always let me push, to town about 5 miles away. When we arrived at our destination, she would hand me the sack and we would walk to the door of the Smith’s house. I remember the house so vividly because most of the homes we visited had no paint on the outside. My grandparents’ home had paint… I never asked why. When we knocked on the door, a very pale and frail woman came to the door. My grandmother would say “ Good morning, Mrs. Smith this is my granddaughter. We were in the garden today and we thought about you and your family, so we wanted to bring you some garden vegetables.” I remember the look in the eyes of this woman as if it was yesterday… it was like a little light of hope sparkled.
Those acts of my grandmother’s generosity imprinted on me one of my life’s most important lessons… helping others and treating everyone with dignity. Some days I fall short of that commitment but most days of my life I have tried to see the light in others eyes.
When Tricia and I began Hope and Healing Place(a nonprofit for grieving families) we knew that a child and family were beginning to heal when we saw that beautiful little light begin to return to their eyes.
Thank you Roy and Grandmother Vera for this time to reflect on how we become who we are!🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼⭐️⭐️⭐️
Your grandmother lives within and through you always. A story I always welcome as I do your gifts and caring….
A fond memory of mine occurs around 1957 (ish) when I was probably 10 or 11. I had a paper route delivering The Washington Post on the Marine base in Quantico, Va. I’d deliver to subscribers in the MOQs, barracks and the naval hospital where my Dad was stationed. The hospital allowed me to place the newspaper on a serving cart and I’d roll it through the various wards. Injured, sick marines or those recovering from surgery were my customers. In one room one day I met a Taiwanese Marine, a 2nd Lt, recovery from an appendectomy. His name was Yin Yan and over the course of the several days he was there I would spend time asking about his home country and why he was at Quantico. After several days I ask my parents if I could invite a friend over for dinner. I told them about Yin Yan, Dad knew who he was, and they said yes. It was a great evening, Yin Yan had never had popcorn and a few other snacks that Mom served. He returned to Taiwan and we corresponded for a number of years – he even sent me an invitation to his wedding – a bit far, and over the course of years we lost contact. I reflect on those days and appreciate getting a taste of someone from another culture and how similar we all are. As a finishing note, one of my younger brothers called me Gaga in those days. He used that name while Yin Yan was visiting. With a startled look Yin Yan said that in Taiwan Gaga meant older brother. Who knew?
Life is an interesting path that continues to change and mold me. I remember moments throughout my life that affected me as well as others. That included a high school coach whose words, his spirit, and his soul that guided and nurtured many of us then as well as now. I hope that my words, and my actions, and my commitments help to mold a world of peace, and of understanding around us as we journey throuh this life together.
You have molded and shaped your life well…..journey on friend. together we do so
You are indeed Gaga to many, and to me. You have shaped your life, and partner, in the best of ways, and memories
Our memories make our existence, no matter how difficult or easy, bearable. We hopefully use the good memories to influence our daily actions to create more good memories. And we use the bad memories to keep us from repeating actions that would lead to more. My very first memory was of falling off the porch swing and hitting my head on the windowsill. Now we know!!
Have a great week.
Wisdom of age and living through the hard times…..level and balanced ground for you today,
I grew up with my paternal Grandmother Jule, who lived with us. My maternal grandmother was Nonna (Italian for grandmother). Jule was an amazing gardener and where I grew up we had beautiful grounds and gardens. My dog Speckles (a Dalmatian) would accompany her on her rounds and I would leave the house and follow. I grew up with a bi-polar brother before that was a real diagnosis and understanding of brain chemistry. This outdoor, nature, person, dog relation shaped my life and provided the solace I needed as a youngster who didn’t always understand the tremendous turmoil my brother was capable of manifesting through no fault of his own.
I cherish Julia (her real name) and Speckles for showing me a path that has led to my soul’s work and passion. Love you Roy and Beth each and every day.
To cherish is to add joy and fullness in your life and soul,,,,,