Roy’s Sunday Letter for May 25, 2025
ALL ABOUT FRIENDS AND FRIENDSHIPS
Richard left a brief voice mail as Wendi and he were driving back to North Carolina after visiting nearby family. When I connected with Richard his words defined long term friendship for us all. “I just wanted to hear your voice.” I treasure Richard’s words, as I consider the voices of friends I have, over time, replaced with emails and text messaging.
Growing up young, among many other young families, we kids ran the streets from morning to night. As we grew into bikes, we added more blocks and new friends with their own bikes. We attended the same schools, some drifting to school bands, sports and a few to drama or debate teams. With high school came cars. Friend groups came and went with old cars and gas purchased from whatever dollars were available.
Beth has friends who share lunch. She schedules a monthly cell calls with others. I share morning coffee with several friends and communicate through social media with others both near and far. We both enjoy sending cards and notes of encouragement and appreciation to both old and newer friends.
I miss friends who look, talk, and have different food tastes, than I. I no longer work in an office, meet with board members and volunteers, or regularly attend community meetings where I would naturally have friendships with those different than I. These are friends who add balance to my life and to my wider circle of friends.
What ways are the best, rewarding ways you connect and communicate with friends? Whose voice, laughter, the catch-up of family and workplaces have you not heard in far too long? You may still use a traditional address book or have replaced with an Excel or Word document. Perhaps you could scan through for a few minutes to identify two or three friends to begin your effort to reconnect and strengthen friendships. I hope all of us find surprises, joy, and new ways of friendships by doing so.
Through our work and civic involvement, in 2025 relationships are more complex than the “just friends” of our youth. New friendships are often formed around chess, work, Spanish language, Bible study, gym class, or sports teams. Our lives are enriched by the never changing old friends as well as the new.
As we age into elderhood, outside factors greatly influence our friendship circles. Friends move to be nearer to grandkids or aging parents. Declining health within a family may be sudden or over a length of time. Recently, a funeral brought 10 friends together who met and knew each other 25 years earlier. We had a far too brief time to laugh and tell stories, asking about others important to us all. Cell phones recorded a now treasured photo of dear friends together once more.
Roy, with gratitude for new and life-long friendships
I love this letter. One thing I have learned about Friendships is you have to make an effort to keep it going. I have two special friends, you might know one of them, that taught together but when two moved to different parts of the metroplex and then across the country, we had to say, o.k when and where can we get together. We made frequent phone calls, some of us better than others, but we were always connected because we made the effort. Still friends today after a few bumps in the road, a friendship I treasure each and every day. Make the effort!
Sunday friend Maurine…..
You 3 committed early to each other….and have made your way through moves, the sadness of missing Jim, and long distant knowing each other in new ways.
What I like 2025 is we 3 are still pushing the traditional limits and creating new spaces with each other……lead om, dear friend, lead on. RB
That reminds me. Next time we get together I want to ask a stranger to take a picture of us with my phone!
Both calendar and cell ohoto read.
Suggest what might be best for you and the village arounf you…..RB
You are a lovely and caring friend to so many people all over the country. You invite folks into your circle and then find new circles through the circles already formed. Inclusive, pluralistic, life changing. I value your writings and your gentle friendship. Hugs to you and Beth.
It was not that long ago you and I thought of friends as next office or next neighborhood.
But no longer.
We are a small part of a wider, bigger world, never stopping 24/7.
All that may be true but not for us.
We are in relationship and always be.
You both be special, unique, wonderful.
More time together ahead…..and that is good. RB
A very interesting, and timely message from great experience. Having recently lost a spouse; I find myself gravitating towards new friends. We were a very tight knit couple and our friends and family were mostly distant. We got together on holidays and for special events. I feel like something is missing when the old friends and family gather, so I am finding new friends the easiest to be around. They don’t know the “us” and I am able to start from scratch with friends. Loving to play games, and learning new games, I am finding the senior citizens group and the older folks at my new apartment a fun and exciting bunch to be around. Not to say I am giving up on old friends and family, but the special occasions and events just don’t satisfy the daily grind of making a life alone. I am making my BLE the best way I can. Planning trips is fun, and meeting people on trip is fun. Whether it is the truck driver from Louisianna I met in a bar at BWW in Amarillo and now are Facebook friends, or the couple I met on a bench in downtown Branson who have invited me to spend time with them when I travel through Great Falls, Montana, hopefully in late August or early September. Staying connected, whether it’s the old or the new, is essential. And Roy, you are doing a great job in making me mindful of that, and making it happen. Keep up your great ministry. You and Beth are touching nerves in a good way, and most of all touching people. Love to you both!
As you are open to new experiences, new sliding doors, early walks, and late fire logs.
You are allowing and creating new opportunities with new faces….good for you!!
who knew your 55+ hallways and tables would be so wonderous……all good. RB
There is nothing quite so marvelous as hearing yours and Beth’s voice on our phone calls. Or maybe it’s re-reading a snail mail, hand made card that contains your and Beth’s writings. Perhaps it’s your personal visits to Casa Linda with you snuggled up on the couch with a pup or cat enjoying morning coffee. Or maybe it’s me visiting FW and having our early morning conversations. You and Beth are amazing connecters and we are the happy recipients of your great friendship and mindfulness. Thank you dear Roy. Thank you dear Beth. Love Linda M
Meeting you first as wise woman i in the Santa Fe Learning Circle.
We 3 have deepened layer by layer…..and more to peel.
There are
count on” friends….You dear friend be one of the wonderful ones.
So, we continue onward……….RB
Roy, thank you for your reflection about friendship. As an only child, friends have been instrumental in my life. Friends have taught me about love that is like family; they have supported me through times of despair; they have surprised me with gifts, kindness, and joy; they have disappointed me; they have given me grace and forgiveness when I probably did not deserve it; they have taught me that the ups and downs of friendship is about life and that we are not alone in this beautiful thing we call life. I am grateful for friends that will be forever in my heart. 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
And I am forever grateful that you are my friend.
I learn from you, as we learn from each other and the village or circle of friends who surround us,
RB
What a pleasure it was to connect with you this past week. Beth provided such a beautiful lunch, and we caught up on what was happening in our busy, retired lives. I let too much time lapse since our last visit and have mede a new resolve to keep in touch on a regular basis.
And for we as well.
Diann Gilmore is a frequent reader and with good comments (by email). Amarillo Ex. Director.
She wrote about the importance of the voice, and she agreed we have traded voice and tone for email and text.
We will clear calendars as you travel in for family. Priority time. RB