Roy’s Sunday Letter for February 2, 2025
BEING A SENIOR IN 2025 AMERICA
I recently completed a story of seniors having lunch at separate tables at Mary’s Grill. Tables were needed to serve waiting families, friends, and office workers. The seniors order lunch Specials and leave small, if any tips. Since Mary’s is a friendly place, for several seniors it is not unusual for them to place a family or pet photo on the table for company during their meal.
Mary, being a really good and generous business owner, attempted to find an answer by placing two long tables in the rear of the main dining room with a sign, Reserved for Seniors: 11 to 1. Lillie and Marie grumbling were guided by the wait staff were guided to their new table. Each found a chair far from another. The drafted story concludes with goodness for seniors and a surprise for Mary.
While drafting The Senior Table, and the ways Mary’s good intentions could and did go sideways, the curious part of me began to consider the good and bad of the lives of seniors in 2025 America.
Today is a time of many opportunities and also challenges for seniors and their families. We have multiple living and housing options, nutrition, exercise, and wellness plans online, and economic growth benefits for many, but certainly not all. The weaving of social programs and networks many of us envisioned and worked to develop and fund since the 1960’s are now being dismissed and dismantled.
I asked senior friends of differing ages, gender, and race to help me describe the traits of many of today’s seniors:
- Do you have a bookcase in your home
- Do you primarily use a paper Calander
- Have you limited meetings and events after 6PM, including driving at night
- Do you have 2 or more friends of different race, gender, or faith
- Do you sometimes confuse A1 steak sauce and AI search assistant
- Have you wanted to show someone a phone photo of grandchild or pet and minutes later said, “I know it’s just right here”
- Do you prefer to hold and read a print book
- Do you watch reports of LA fires and wonder what I would do if….
- In addition to family and friends asking about your past, for all the right reasons, do you also want to be asked What’s next? What is exciting for you today, and for the tomorrows to come?
Today’s seniors are at risk of scams, of harm in a parking lot, of not seeing an approaching car at a stop sign. We are getting better at being aware when family or friend begin to isolate, not show up, and are separating. We nod with the reality; we are only as good as the next lab report. Today’s seniors are good at watching, knowing the news but also turning off the TV, laying our phone down, and going for a walk, looking up into the blue sky with wonder and amazement.
I am a 2nd career writer. I stand in a Circle of Storytellers. Within my Circle are Women writers, Black writers, Hispanic writers, Asian writers, Gay and Lesbian writers, writers of Faith, and White writers as myself. I understand my simple stories will not change the world, but I wrote each one in the hope my telling would touch the heart and spirit of the reader, and perhaps like healing medicine, the life of others.
Roy, time for telling a story, taking a walk
My new life at Carol Woods, an upscale retirement center, is new and different. I’m trying to adjust as is my 12 year old senior dog . We are used to being on our own and is overwhelming having so many folks around. I have been here since January 29th. Maria and her husband were here for four days helping me open boxes(40) of them. I have too much of everything,
My home of 46 years sold for an amazing price and have found myself with plenty of money. Fears of running out of money are gone so I am trying to relax and enjoy simple pleasures.
Good morning. thanks for the thoughts on aging.. I am 64, old to those in their 20’s.. young to those in their 80’s.. I’m learning, ” feeling one’s age”, is by daily perception.
I met a new neighbor a few weeks ago.. I was out walking the dogs, ( twice daily), and took a detour up this cul de sac. Les was just closing his mailbox,( street side). we chatted a bit and he asked my age and gave me his, along with his upcoming birthdate of 2-01…. his announcement was accompanied with his thanks to God for a long and wonderful life. Yesterday, 2-01, I stopped by Les’s, bringing a bouquet of flowers and 1 jelly and 1 chocolate covered donut, to celebrate his 89th birthday. To my delight he was greatly surprised and very touched.. we had a great visit and he introduced me to Peggy, his wife of 58 years. Her ashes are in a beautiful urn up on the bookshelf. As I was leaving Les once again thanked God for his wonderful life, such a wonderful wife, and thanked God for me, his new friend…. as I walked the few blocks home I felt so alive, so energized and spry and so very happy.. Time and aging march on, I must stay in tune with the items that help my perceptions stay energized and happy, despite my age.
keep writing Roy… Happy Sunday..
As a therapist, I have worked with several seniors who have been victims of scams. As a senior myself I am always reading about how to avoid being the next victim of such evil intent. It’s not paranoia when they really are out to get you! Stay safe everyone. Stay connected. Do what brings you joy. Now I will walk my dog.
Walking and sharing the path together all part of a sane day, which we all need even today.
Hou indeed be good people….
RB
I have to answer “ yes” to many of the questions posed in your writings today. I have several bookcases and certainly try not to drive after dark. Some of my limitations are self imposed but many are a part of the aging process. I was looking forward to an activity yesterday but an issue with my eye kept me from completing a fun day. Things happen due to circumstances beyond my control and it seems to happen more as I age. But, we continue to make plans and move forward. Your stories are special because they reflex a positivity we all need especially right now. Keep writing you have more stories to tell.
You were missed but somehow also included at the table by story telling and the smiles and laughter,
And you can have your own personal Valentine experience….I know the teacher.
You b special.
You and can write out the lines of a Jim story together…..perhaps it is time.
RB
So many have gone before me, at ages much younger than I. When I contemplate the fabric of my life—the warp and the weft—I take away the knowledge that each day is the one day that I am blessed to have. I do my best to be grateful and to practice Gratitude. Your Sunday letters are a gift to us Roy; and your resilience and future-forward thinking inspire. Thank you for each story, each word, each moment of reflection. X/O LM
I am a slow learner, inspired and encourages by others.
No one on this rocky path alone….holding heart hands as we find our way, together.
Gettin’ old ain’t what it used to be…,
My east texas dryland farmers just old….couldn’t farm, died 1 week apart.
now, i have a 2ns career, something that would never be in their world.
Glad you alive and well, in whatever career that might be 2025.
RB
I consider aging my storm to weather, but ultimately I spend my days walking through it with the grace of an umbrella searching for the next serendipitous moment to capture with words. It can be quite the adventure, this bumpy unknown. jan
Yes, both bumpy and unknown.
And the good part is you can create your own smooth and known path.
Jan, you are both awake and aware….creating and magical in all ways……..RB
First of all, thank you for your SL. I always find a few nuggets that help me look at the world from a new perspective or the provide framework to meet the challenges of the day or just make me smile. As I get older. the journey seems like an interesting hike through rolling hills, sometimes getting into the top and feeling full of energy, purpose, and focus, and sometimes feeling pretty low and spent. Your friendship and writings are always motivation to get back to the top of the hill.
And encouraging words back o me as well.
I do not know your current ups and downs.
I do know you are brave, always show courage, and present the best of showing up, being present.
We can always use this phone think to talk on, strange behavior though it be.
Always friendship…..RB
Hi, Roy, thank you for your insight. I do have to question one point…you say your writing won’t change the world. But I have to disagree. By touching the hearts and minds of your readers, you ARE changing the world. Too often, I am find myself tempted to despair in the face of the enormity of the problems I can’t fix. In those moments, I try to focus on who is being placed in my path. How can I help this one who is in front of me, right here, right now? How can I be kindness in my world and in theirs? You are doing that with your writing. I think there is power in that, and if enough of us share our wisdom and our love with the people on our path, we do and will change the world.
Your words Kindness in all ways.
I have learned to write and then let go…let the readers find the truth or meaning best for them that day, that paragraph.
Giving thought this AM to H and the new/different days ahead.
He will do well. You both will do well.
I learned from the bounce off a wall, find a new, unexpected path.
Yes, the person in front of us is our world.
Always nearby…Iced tea on me any time,
I will Attach a story to you later today about all this. Title: My Turn……RB